weddingsv make me drug and hornr
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
