wrigley field is MILF paradise
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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