Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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