You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
