i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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