no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
