idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
