I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
