Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
