i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize