hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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