just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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