so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
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