i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize