I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
