fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
