My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
