Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
