When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
two words...techno handjob
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
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