Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
