Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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