Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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