I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
whose ass print is on the piano?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
