I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
