I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
farters have to be the big spoon...
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
