do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
