no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
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