How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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