Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
there was a trapeze. enough said
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
