So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize