My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
nutella sex= disaster
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
