doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
she told me i tasted like america
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Randomize
