tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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