Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize
