Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize