the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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