seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
this boner is exhausting
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
