She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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