when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
