So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
