hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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