I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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