If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
