so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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