i already hear my dad disowning me
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize