Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
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