Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
