Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
