3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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