whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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